back around christmas time, i tweeted a plea for everyone to share with me their secrets for getting rid of dark circles under my eyes. in poured the recommendations from hydrating and avoiding sodium to using cold compresses and aromatherapy. that was a dream come true and exactly what i was looking for but i realized that i was exhibiting a symptom indicative of something i have come to absolutely despise about our culture. i was looking for the quick fix.
i think i was born with dark circles. i can’t remember a time, even as far back as when i was a teenager, when they didn’t plague me. even though they come to me naturally, they are also accentuated with certain behaviours. while i filtered through all of the helpful advice, i had a niggling little feeling in the back of my mind that i wasn’t really getting to the bottom of it. essentially, i was in denial.
when i asked my naturopath about her thoughts when it comes to dark circles, she replied, “well, how much sleep do you get, carly?” oh, snap. there it was. i had no right to complain about what was ailing me because i was really not willing to take the first step towards curing it! my mind flooded with examples of antidepressants over therapy, liposuction over exercise, vitamins over eating whole foods. i was acting like one of those people.
i wish i could tell you that i’d solved my sleep riddle since then, but i haven’t. it is the one arena in which i have just never been able to take hold. like i say to people who balk at investing in healthy living, “what better way could there be to spend your money than on your health?” of myself, i need to ask “what better way to spend my time?”
when i first met kevin, i was doing my sleep experiment. the idea behind it was that i would sleep at every opportunity and set my alarm to go to bed at 9pm every night. (that provides me eight hours of sleep on a weekday.) i still have a little note he wrote me that said “this sleep experiment is messing with your mojo.” if by mojo, he meant ability to live through that dreamy, adrenaline-filled early stage of a new relationship, then he was right. it kind of was. the sleep experiment ground to a halt and la-la-love ensued. now that the honeymoon’s over (:P) one year later, it may be time to revisit the idea because something’s gotta give.
my dilemma lies in learning how to juggle all of the things that i want and need to do: office work, bellies work, pioneers work, il indoor, cook and eat healthy meals, move my body, blog, write, communicate with loved ones and have some fun. i’m not sure if efficiency is my issue or if i just suck at time management. i don’t really see that i am doing any more than most other people and they all seem to pull it off. is everybody out there as exhausted as i am or what?!?
as always, i give great credit to awareness. it’s a step in the right direction. as i push through and attempt to live nourish, this is definitely something that needs more focus. if you have any ideas, i’ll be here scratching my head and wondering how.
(for the record, i believe wholeheartedly in everything in its place. i’m not staunchly against the use of antidepressants, but i do question the widespread prescription. i believe that vitamins have their merit, i just don’t think they should be your only source of nourishment. lipo? i don’t really know where that fits is, but maybe someday i’ll get it.)